Pairings: Trunks+Goten (note the '+', there's a difference)
Notes: This doesn't exactly have a place in the timeline, it's just
when Trunks 18ish and Goten is 17ish. The lengths of the
chapters vary, I tried
to keep them all decent, sorry for anything too short
Warnings: Angst, my sense of humor, Goten torture (in a sense at least), and need I mention shounen ai?
Disclaimer: DBZ mine? I wish!
School again. Dreaded school. It was so confining. I couldn't allow
my mind to wonder and sort out my thoughts. I couldn't
walk up to my once again best friend and give him a hug. And I couldn't keep my eyes off of the man who sat mere feet in
front of me. I stared at the back of his head, contemplating what was going on in his mind.
What does he think of me now? He didn't say it, but I know he's not
sure of me. I don't blame him, I couldn't speak when he
came out to me and here we are in a relationship- is it a relationship? Is it that serious? Did I regain my best friend then turn
him into my boyfriend? Am I gay? How could I react to him the way I did if I am the same way? Am I a hypocrite?
I tried to think things out only to cause more questions. My mind never
seemed to fail, when I thought I had arrived at a
conclusion, there came more things for me to think about.
"Son Goten, what is so interesting about the back of Trunks' head that
would cause you to ignore your exam?" The teacher
asked loudly from her desk.
The students next to me snickered while those further away craned their
necks to see. I sank low in my seat, willing a blush
not to come to my face. Trunks turned around raising an eyebrow and wearing the look only he and his father possessed.
"I hope you weren't looking for bugs, Go-chan." Trunks joked.
"N-no.... I was...um..." I trailed off, why was it my mind never worked when speaking lately?
"Ignoring your work is what you were doing. Honestly, you two are practically
attached at the hip, count the hairs on his
head later." I blushed. "And I expect your essay in triplicate, Son Goten, by tomorrow." Some students gasped, while most
returned to their work silently, fearing the wrath of our teacher.
Trunks sent a sorry looked; I shrugged and smirked, starting my writing.
The bell rang, sending students from their seats and through the door
with the speed possessed only by those escaping
torture. I failed in scooping up my books, sending a stack of papers to the floor. Trunks chuckled softly.
Trunks and I bent to get my work at the same time, hitting heads. I
frowned at the impact. He handed me my books and put
an arm around my shoulders casually.
He's so natural about it, about us. Like it's not a big deal. He doesn't
seem to even remember what happened when he told
me he was gay, and that was only a month ago. How can he forget so easily when I still think about it everyday?
"You have a hard head, Chibi."
"Genetics," I offered, grinning, and slightly leaning into his side
as we exited the room. I felt his chest shake as he laughed
softly, squeezing my arm.
I tried to act as he did. To show him I cared for him and needed him.
I wanted to show him my love, and that's what I was
doing. Showing love. Right?
We continued to our next class, few words exchanged allowing other conversations
to fill the silence. As we passed a
group of my friends I slinked out of his hold, creating a 'friendly' distance between us. My move seemed to go unnoticed by
him, save for the small sigh that escaped his mouth.
Days drug by torturously slow, eventually turning into a week. And with
every slow day my mind raced, thinking about what
had occupied my being for awhile now. Thinking about Trunks. I tried to relax, to give my mind a chance to think about
something else less complicated, yet the thoughts always returned.
There was another problem I had noticed throughout the week. Whenever
I was with Trunks I would go out of my way to
seem 'casual', to not raise suspicion.
I prayed he wouldn't notice, but knew he did. With every sigh or sad
look that crossed his face I knew. But he hadn't said
anything; he kept going through it like nothing was happening.
Lost in my thoughts I managed to walk right into the back of another guy. A jock no less.
He turned and sneered at me, "Watch it, half pint."
I stared at him curiously. His larger size intimidating though I knew
he couldn't hurt me. But as if by some far off instinct I felt
shivers run through my body. "Sorry," I mumbled, continuing my stare.
"You don't sound sorry." He said with cocky grin on his face. He shoved my chest.
I stepped backward, startled by his actions. I raised my eyebrow at the guy.
He sneered at me again, advancing slowly. "It's scum like you that need to be taught respect."
A smile crossed my lips as a laugh threatened its way closer to my mouth.
He raised a hand to strike me but another caught
"Knock it off." I knew that voice, Trunks' voice. It was the one person who had been in my head for the longest time.
Trunks glared at the jock, tossing his hand down. Without saying anything
else he gestured with a slight shake of his head
and we left the hall.
"Never mess with the jocks, Chibi, you are crunchy and good with ketchup you know." Trunks said, winking at me.
"I thought that saying was about dragons."
"It is. But is there much difference between a dumb jock and a dumb dragon?"
"Yes, dragons don't smell as bad." I wrinkled my nose for emphasis. Trunks smiled and rolled his eyes.
We fell quiet as we continued down the hall, Trunks' arm finding it's
way to my shoulders again. I sighed quietly, why
couldn't I just enjoy this?
"You know, you didn't have to do that." Trunks looked at me. "I could've handled him."
"I was just trying to help, Chibi, I didn't think you would mind."
I sighed again, "Yeah, I know."
He eyed me with a funny look, "What's wrong?"
"Wrong? Nothing's wrong." I said, trying to convince myself as much as him.
"You're not being yourself, Goten, something's not right."
"Everything's fine." I said in a sigh. The words left my mouth though
I didn't believe them. I wanted to, but I couldn't force the
lie upon myself.
"Hn," Trunks looked at me again. A blush rose to my cheeks under his
stare. Without a word I was yanked into the men's
restroom and led to a corner. "We should talk, something's wrong, you can't lie about it."
Why are you doing this, Trunks? Why are you forcing me to admit what
I don't want to? I want to be your best friend again. I
want us to be 'Trunks and Goten' like we always had been.
I sighed again. Looking down I muttered, "Where do we stand now?"
"What?" He asked, though I knew he had heard me.
"Where do we stand? Where are we? What are we?" I looked into his eyes, searching for the answer I couldn't find.
"What do you mean, Chibi?"
"I mean are we still just 'Trunks and Goten'? Or are we more than that?
Is it more complicated now? Are we not best friends
anymore? Are we...boyfriends?" I rushed out with my questions, wringing my hands.
"I thought you wanted--" I cut him off by flinging my arms around him.
His body stiffened with surprise. I clung to him, the
reason why I didn't understand myself.
My breathing hiccupedand my brows furrowed. I didn't want to cry. I
couldn't cry. I was going to figure this out; I couldn't just
fall to him for everything.
Tears fell onto Trunks' shoulder.
I had never felt so lonely in the presence of another as I did then.
There was my best friend, yet I didn't know what we had
anymore. I couldn't understand what I had become, what had happened. All I knew was the gnawing in my stomach. I
needed him, I wanted him, and I had him. Why was I not satisfied?
Before he could put his arms around me I was off of him and heading
towards the toilet. The gnawing in my stomach had
turned into a burning. I felt dizzy as I braced myself against the stall wall. My mouth watered with an acidic taste. My
stomach lurched and up came its contents.
"Goten? Are you okay?" His hand was on my shoulder as I slid down the
wall. Beads of sweat mingled with the tears,
confusing their paths. I panted to catch my breath.
I tried to answer but my throat was hot. I nodded. Trunks walked to
the sink and dampened a paper towel. He kneeled by
my side and gently wiped my face. He wiped my lips with the towel then offered it to me. I set it on my chest.
"You sure you're okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine." I answered, finding that sitting was easier than standing
after my failed attempt at getting up. He put a hand
to my forehead.
"You don't feel hot," Trunks said with a motherly tone.
I would've laughed had questions not bombarded my mind. I closed my
eyes to concentrate. The dark was comforting,
numb and cool. I fell to it, letting it engulf me.
I heard Trunks' voice, but it was distant and quiet. The darkness was close and inviting so I didn't struggle against it.
The numb filled my mind, it was almost nice.
Well, that's it for this chapter. There will be more. and you WILL read
and review it.. ALL of it. EVERY LAST WORD. Um.
Hehe ^_^;; That's the lil voice in my head 'tis all. Anyway, thanks go ta Vindali, Rikki and Liz, and B- chan the Psycho
Saiyajin Sorceress for the reviews. So, follow their lead, ne? Review! ^_-V
BACK to Fanfics
BACK to Part 4
ON to Part 6